Supporting Autism Families: Meet Our New Social Worker

counseling-mallory

One of the unique services we provide here at Healing Haven is counseling for a variety of people impacted by an autism diagnosis. Our counselors support autism families through working directly with individuals with autism, as well as their parents and siblings.

Navigating an autism diagnosis can be complex for parents, as well as for some children and teens who feel different compared to their peers. Some may also struggle with social skills and interacting with others, or need help in understanding and controlling their emotions. We did a previous post on counseling and autism, featuring our onsite therapist Danielle. And now we are excited to announce the newest addition to our team, Mallory Meter. Mallory is a social worker who started providing counseling services for autism families here at Healing Haven in September 2019.

Mallory worked in the Chicago area for the past four years. She has a Bachelors of Arts from the University of Notre Dame where she majored in psychology. She then received her Masters of Social Work from The School of Social Service and Administration at University of Chicago. 

In preparation for her transition here to Healing Haven, we sat down with Mallory to get to know her better. Learn about her experience and approach to therapy, and how she might support you and/or your child:

HH:  Why did you want to work with kids with autism / special needs?

MM: I have always been passionate about working with children. I am a strong believer that children can teach us so much about ourselves and how to be better human beings. This is especially the case when it comes to children impacted by autism and developmental differences. While these children can face a number of challenges, they also carry so much creativity, potential, and strength. Being able to face challenges alongside these children, to learn from their resilience, and to witness their growth and change is endlessly exciting and a true honor for me.

HH: Describe your career background and other experiences you have that are a benefit to the work you will do here at Healing Haven.

MM: My first job out of graduate school was at a Chicago-area therapeutic day school for children with autism called Giant Steps. This role provided me with extensive exposure to interventions aimed at promoting social-emotional development in this population. Additionally, I learned how to navigate the world of public schools and IEPs. As a result of working closely with a multidisciplinary team made up of speech and language pathologists, occupational therapists, BCBAs and special education teachers, this role provided indispensable opportunities to learn new and creative ways to intervene with and support children impacted by autism spectrum disorder.

Following this role, I worked as a social worker on the inpatient psychiatry unit at Ann & Robert H. Lurie Children’s Hospital of Chicago where I also completed my training practicum in graduate school. Here I was able to further develop my understanding of a range of psychiatric diagnoses and strengthen my skills in providing evidence-based treatments at an individual, family, and group therapy level. Most recently, I had moved into a new position within the Division of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and the Division of Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics where I provided case management, parent training, and therapeutic/educational support to families and children impacted by ASD, Down Syndrome, Intellectual Disability, and a range of additional learning differences. More than anything, my time at Lurie Children’s Hospital confirmed my passion for working with children and adolescents impacted by developmental differences, especially those impacted by comorbid mental health concerns.

HH: What motivates you coming to work every day?

MM: My favorite part of this work is partnering with children and families. I love helping them feel understood, accepted, and supported in a way they haven’t before. The moments when a caregiver or child communicates in some way these feelings of being seen, accepted, and supported are what motivates me to come to work everyday. Coffee is always helpful too…

HH: Describe the types of counseling you will do with clients at Healing Haven. Skills you will work on, tools you will incorporate to help clients grow, etc.

MM: I hope to promote a wide range of skills and areas of growth in my work at Healing Haven. These include emotional identification and regulation skills, perspective taking and social skills, and coping/distress tolerance skills. I would describe my therapeutic lens as trauma-informed, strengths-based, relational and family systems-informed. Attachment therapy is also a guiding framework in my work. Within this broader stance, I pull from a number of evidence-based treatments including: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and Brief Solutions Focused Therapy to name a new. Additionally, a few specific tools I love to utilize in my work with autism families and children include mindfulness, Collaborative and Proactive Solutions, and Social Thinking strategies.

HH: What is a favorite memory of working with a client?

MM: My favorite memory was being staffed with a little guy on my caseload at Giant Steps. We had a field trip to a pool. He had previously been extremely scared (emphasis on extremely) of water. After a ton of work he was able to get in the pool and even go on the water slide! As a result, I’ll never forget his smile that day.

And here some fun things to know about Mallory 😊

  • Favorite food: Bread, bread, bread
  • Radio Station/Music on iPod: NPR or my own music
  • Favorite movie: Wild
  • How do you relax/de-stress outside of work: Spending time with family, yoga, reading (I’m a huge bookworm!)
  • Drink: Coffee
  • Favorite book: I don’t think I can pick just one!

As you can see, Mallory is a great asset to have on our team. We are excited to have her here helping autism families! If you are a parent in need of help for yourself, or your child is struggling with things related to their autism, ADHD, depression or anxiety, we are here to help! Simply fill out the Contact Us form and we will get back with you!

Autism Parenting: Help for Stressed Relationships

Autism-parenting

Having a child with autism, Down syndrome or any other type of special needs brings all kinds of new realities into your life. Some can be amazing – like gaining a whole new community of people you may have never met before. But other things can definitely add stress to the lives of autism parents. From more doctor appointments to navigating special education and IEPs, to scheduling therapies – all of these new realities can put stress on your relationships with your spouse, your family members and your friends.

With the help of Allie Young-Rivard, LLPC, we’ve compiled some information and resources to help autism parents with relationships that may be under stress.

Marriage – The odds are NOT stacked against you

There’s an often-quoted statistic that the divorce rate among parents who have a child with autism is around 80%. Or it’s at least quoted as being higher than the general population. This outdated figure was based on older, smaller studies, which can often lead to inaccurate data.

The Interactive Autism Network, which connects the autism community and researchers, breaks down the updated research findings in their article Under a Looking Glass: What’s the Truth About Autism and Marriage?:

“Researchers in Baltimore investigated the supposed 80 percent divorce rate for parents of a child with autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Unlike other studies, this one was particularly large – using data from almost 78,000 parents, 913 of whom had a child with autism – and included families from across the United States. The bigger the study, the less likely the results are due to chance or something unique about the pool of people studied. The researchers, from Kennedy Krieger Institute and Johns Hopkins University, found no evidence of an 80 percent divorce rate.9 In fact, parents of children with autism split up as often as parents of children who don’t have autism, according to their research.”

We hope this new information encourages you that even though you may face some stress in your marriage due to your child’s diagnosis, it doesn’t automatically mean your marriage is doomed because of autism. If your marriage is struggling, ask for help before it’s too late.

When Divorce Does Happen

Even with this hopeful news for couples who have an autistic child, there are still a lot of marriages under stress. Deciding to divorce is complex and difficult. This life-altering course can cause intense anxiety. It can also cause worry about how the decision to separate will affect your children. For parents of children with special needs, the choice to separate and/or divorce is particularly difficult because of the added needs and responsibilities.

Support for Your Child

Many children on the autism spectrum have difficulty adapting to change. So naturally it is common for parents to worry how their child will acclimate to their new reality, routine and living situation. It is important to prepare your child for the changes that are going to happen.  Providing your child with a visual schedule that outlines the custody arrangements will help them know what to expect. Having consistency at both houses will also be helpful. Work together to have a similar calendar at both locations that shows your child’s daily routines and notes what house he or she will be at. By using tools that prepare them you can help them understand their new routine and hopefully reduce some anxiety. Additionally, talking about the schedule ahead of time to avoid surprises is beneficial for everyone involved.

Another helpful idea is to create a social story explaining the changes and what to expect. If your child receives ABA therapy, talk with their BCBA about creating a personalized social story to prepare them for their new routine and the changes in their family situation.

Lastly, depending on the age of the child and their communication ability, seeking a therapist who specializes in adjustment could be helpful. We have counselors on our team who work with children and teens on the autism spectrum. Seeing an experienced therapist can help children process their new family dynamics and adjust to the changes. Please contact us if you would like to pursue counseling for your child.

Co-parenting

It is important for a divorced couple to remember that is it about the child (or children). The definition of co-parenting is:

Verb; (especially of a separated or unmarried couple) share the duties of parenting (a child).

Keeping your focus on doing what is best for your child can help both parents stay on track and follow through on maintaining routines. Establishing and upholding proper communication with your former spouse will ensure support and success for your child. If communication with your ex is difficult, seek out family counseling and/or individual therapy if your former spouse is unwilling to join you. Counseling can help you learn how best to work together for the common interest of your child.

Family or Friends Who Don’t Understand Your Child’s Unique Needs

When your child is diagnosed with a disability it can often feel like you’re alone. Those close to you may not understand what you’re going through as you navigate therapies, doctors, support at school and situations that are difficult for your child. Some may spend less time with you and your family. This often stems from not really understanding the diagnosis. When a family member or close friend expresses criticism of your child’s behavior, or of you as a parent, it’s important to address it.

You can first try to explain what your child’s diagnosis means, how it impacts them medically, emotionally, behaviorally, etc. Explain the therapies and medical treatments they are receiving and why. Talk about what their education situation is like and how it benefits them. If your child has sensory issues, repetitive behaviors or stimming, difficulty with change, etc, it’s good to take time to explain them to your family. Being open and honest can help your loved ones understand and hopefully lead to support from them. 

Is It Time To Set Boundaries?

If, however, after explaining all of these things, they isolate you or stop talking with you, first know that it’s not you or your child. It is their inability to be sensitive and understanding of differences and supportive of those with unique needs. If you are facing criticism or lack of understanding toward your child, you may need to establish boundaries. This may mean limiting time spent at family gatherings, or not taking your kids to their grandparents’ house.

Whatever the situation you are facing, it’s important to remove yourself from unsupportive relationships and find support from others in similar situations. Setting boundaries with unsupportive family members can be tough, but putting your mental health and the child’s well being first is beneficial for everyone. Additionally, a professional counselor can help you develop coping skills to navigate strained relationships, as well as help you process your own feelings regarding your child’s diagnosis.

We hope you’ve found this information and ideas for autism parents helpful as you encounter stress in various relationships. And if you find you need some outside help and perspective, please reach out to us!

Know others who would benefit from reading this? Use the buttons below to share it with your community:

Counseling and Autism

counseling

The Value of Counseling for Families Impacted by Autism

Receiving an autism diagnosis can result in a lot of uncertainty, anxiety and stress for parents, as well as for the child diagnosed and their siblings. So appropriately, counseling and autism go together like macaroni and cheese. When Healing Haven started in 2010, our foundational programs were ABA therapy and stress management services. We later added more programs, expanding the ages we provide ABA for, and providing additional supports like Speech Therapy, Counseling, Occupational Therapy and Academic Instruction.

Stress management for parents of children with special needs is critical, as “parent well-being increases child well-being”. Research tells us that parents can be effective agents of change for their children’s behaviors. Additionally, children and teens with autism often need help addressing their emotional needs, anxiety, and social challenges.

Our counseling services cover a wide range of needs. For parents we help them navigate this autism diagnosis, manage stress, and learn behavioral modification skills. For the child with autism we help them learn skills to manage their emotions and interact in the world around them. Additionally, we help siblings process the emotions that come from having a brother or sister on the spectrum and provide them with strategies to cope.

Meet Our Counselor

Our onsite therapist, Danielle Harrison, MA, LPC, has been working with families impacted by autism and other special needs since 2012. She started as an ABA therapist while in her undergraduate psychology program. After receiving her master’s in counseling she transitioned to the role of Counselor. Her experience in ABA therapy is a valuable tool that Danielle uses often in her counseling sessions, whether it’s with children, or while providing Parent Training.

Danielle working with her
Social Skills Group

Danielle uses techniques of applied behavior analysis to shape behaviors in children with autism. She uses Cognitive Behavior Therapy as well as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to help them work through the emotions that may be causing them trouble. She also provides Parent Training to help families understand the concepts of reinforcement and discipline in an effort to help them set up reinforcement systems at home.

Some clients may not have an official autism diagnosis, but struggle with anxiety, depression, ADHD or other issues. She is not only able to work with the child, but also able to equip parents to manage emotions and reduce disruptive behaviors.

Navigating the Diagnosis

Danielle enjoys helping parents work through their emotions to help them accept their child’s diagnosis. Once a parent is able to come to terms with their child’s deficits and appreciates their strengths, their stress often lessens and their relationship with their child strengthens.

Another aspect of Danielle’s work is helping teens with autism who struggle with belonging, finding friends at school, and relating with their peers.

The Role of Advocate

Danielle says the most fulfilling aspect of her job is being an advocate for her children and teens. She enjoys using her skill set to collaborate with families and schools to help her clients reach their maximum potential.

A Front Seat to Growth

We have observed first hand the growth in so many of Danielle’s clients. For example, she has a client for which she has worked with over the past seven years. When she started, the child was only 3 years old and unable to communicate her emotions, often leading to meltdowns. Now at the age of 10 she is able to effectively communicate her wants and needs. If she becomes upset, she now has the skills to calm down in under 10 minutes verses two to three hours. Witnessing that kind of growth is so motivating for Danielle.

Another incubator for personal growth is the social skills group Danielle leads. The group of elementary age clients has been together for two years. When they first started they worked on basic social skills. Now they have formed real friendships. They support each other when one of them is upset. The skills they have learned here have helped them in their everyday environments at home and at school. Danielle hopes to see this group stay together as they move into their teen years.

In Need of Help?

As you can see, counseling has broad benefits in the autism world. If you are a parent in need of help for yourself, or your child is struggling with autism, ADHD, depression or anxiety, we are here to help! Just fill out the Contact Us form and we will get back with you!